The Best Story: My Life

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, 

says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, 

  to give you a future and a hope."

                     Jeremiah 29:11                    

    God is good. That sounds so simple and yet, in reality, I don't believe it. I believe God has good plans for those close to me and I am so good at encouraging others and reminding them of God's faithfulness. Yet, when it comes to myself, I intellectually know God is good but I don't believe He will be good to me. I believe my plans for my life are better. My story should be written my way; not God's way. To accept anything less, is to condemn myself to a life of self-denying martyrdom. I think it is easier to grasp onto this bitter thought when life is hard. When I feel pain, it is much easier to believe God has called me to hardship than to see the hardship as actually a step in His loving plan for me. It is harder to accept that God's plan, even if it involves pain, is actually better than my own. 

    God has given me so many encouragements this summer but it has been easier to look at the glass half-empty instead of half-full. I am so grateful that my God is a God who hears my prayers and sees my tears and cares. He cares! Yet, through it all, He asks me to lay down my plans and accept with thankfulness the plans He has for me. That doesn't mean I have to like my circumstances or be a naive optimist who thinks the world is made of roses but instead know that, no matter what God's plan for me, it is actually good. It is better than mine. It is something I will delight in as He makes His desires my own. He just asks me to give mine over. 

    That sounds scary, doesn't it? But, what if that means all the desires I have now never come true? So be it. That means God's are better. That means my version of my life, which seems the best to me, actually is subpar to the story God is writing for me. I can believe that because Jeremiah 29:11 says so. My feelings don't agree. In fact, often they don't. But, God has me on a journey to renew my mind in His promises. Something tells me that He is going to come through, and my story will be beautiful. So much more beautiful than my own. Lord, help me to believe it! I don't want to trade my plans because I think they are better. Forgive me, and set me free to pursue yours. Make my desires your own. Please, write that story and make my life the best story.