Ivan Torrent is a very gifted contemporary composer. One of my favorite pieces is "Before I Leave This World" from his Reverie album. I highly recommend giving it a listen!
Ivan was kind enough to agree to an interview. He asked to do the interview in written format as English is not his first language. Please enjoy the sixteenth installment in a "glimpse into a life series" highlighting composer, Ivan Torrent. Thank you, Ivan, for sharing aspects of your life story.
1. How would you describe your childhood?
My childhood was overall a happy one, despite experiencing some familiar bumps along the way. There were moments of difficulties and challenges that we encountered, and that affected me in some areas of life, but with time I managed to overcome them.
I have always been an "explorer," a hectic mind. Even now as an adult, I continue to pursue new interests and hobbies such as drawing, painting, and performing music. I have always been curious about the arts and sciences, particularly astronomy.
I had to overcome obstacles, the most significant of which was bullying. Unfortunately, I was a frequent target of bullies, and it led to some lonely times. My life experiences have taught me the value of perseverance and speaking out for what I believe in. Despite the difficulties, I made friends for life and forged cherished memories with my family and friends. What I value most, however, is the opportunity to learn about and engage with many forms of artistic expression, particularly music.
2. What is your fondest memory as a child?
One picture from my childhood jumps out as one of my favorites. It was the day my mum ignited the spark of my love for music without even realizing she was doing it. She showed me how to record my own voice on a cassette tape.
I remember that orange BASF tape, and the old recording where I talked like it was yesterday. I was surprised to hear my voice and the simple word "hi" that I had just taped. It felt like magic, as if my own thoughts were coming to life as an echo through that machine.
That moment made me feel something. It gave me a love for sound and, more recently, music that has stayed with me to this day. From that day on, designing sounds, or writing music and lyrics, brought me comfort and happiness. It became a way for me to talk about how I felt and connect with the world around me.
Music became my way out, and my friend through the good times and the bad. It gave me a way to show who I was, and to find peace in the songs that spoke to my soul. It gave me a lot of ideas and energy and drove me to try out, learn about, and make music in different styles.
That moment with my mom was crucial when I think about it now. I keep it as a gem in my mind.
3. What conversation with your mom and dad impressed itself upon your memory?
I've never talked about this before, but certainly it was when I came out as a gay man. It was a significant moment in my life, as it is for anyone who has gone through a similar experience. I understand that times have changed since I was 25-years-old, and younger generations may have an easier time, but the emotions involved can still make it challenging.
We need to remember that being LGBTQ+ is not a choice, but just one aspect of who we are as individuals. It can be disheartening to face judgment for something that is inherent to our identity and can't be chosen, just like we can't choose the color of our eyes, or if we love blue rather than red. It is what it is. It should never be a reason for discrimination, harassment, or bullying. No one has the right to dictate someone else's path or suppress their true feelings because it doesn't fit their preconceived notions.
The fact that we even have to "come out" is a reflection of the difficulties and challenges that being gay often presents. Unlike my siblings, who never had to explicitly state their sexual orientation, I had to reveal this aspect of myself due to societal norms. Millions of individuals still face difficulties in this area, especially in nations with weak human rights protections and laws that make it illegal to be gay. In an advanced and progressive society, this is completely unthinkable and unacceptable.
Despite my initial concerns, these conversations with my parents, even though these conversations were not easy at first, became easier later. Not only my parents, but my whole family has been supportive and understanding. Their tolerance and encouragement have let me be myself and keep going. I'm proudly married to a wonderful man, and I'm happy to live my life in freedom respected by my friends and family.
4. What would you title your autobiography and why?
I would probably choose Resilience, like one of my songs, as the title for my autobiography because it perfectly captures the main theme of my life. I have encountered countless difficulties, setbacks, and struggles, but I have consistently managed to rise above them. I have gained valuable insights from my experiences and become stronger. My chosen title emphasizes the significant role that resilience has played in shaping my identity and delivers the message that, regardless of the challenges we confront, we have the ability to conquer them and flourish.
5. What is the meaning of life to you?
The purpose of life, as I see it, is the continuous process of personal growth, spiritual enlightenment, and becoming into a more whole and fulfilled person. It's about being open to new information and experiences, growing as people, and broadening our horizons. Each of us has the chance to learn more about ourselves and the world as we go through life.
I think we are given this life to gain knowledge, triumph over adversity, and develop qualities like kindness, generosity, and insight. Life is a process of self-discovery in which we evolve towards our full potential. It's about being proud of who we are and what we provide to the world, about making genuine relationships with other people, and making a difference through our actions.
Moreover, reincarnation is something I have complete faith in. For me, life is a never-ending cycle of birth, death, and rebirth rather than a discrete event. There are lessons to be learned, spiritual developments to be made, and consciousness-raising to be accomplished in every existence. By going through this, we may reach enlightenment and go into higher realms of existence.
6. What makes life beautiful to you?
What makes life beautiful to me is the ability to connect with others on a deep level, and music plays a significant role in facilitating that connection. When I listen to or create music, I feel a sense of unity with others who may have similar tastes or experiences. Music allows me to express myself in ways that words alone cannot, and it serves as a universal language that transcends cultural and linguistic barriers. It can bring us joy, provide solace during difficult times, and even inspire us to take action or make positive changes in our lives.
The beauty of music also lies in its vast diversity. There are countless genres, styles, and artists to explore, each with their own unique sound and message. This diversity allows us to discover new perspectives, expand our horizons, and appreciate the richness of human creativity. The power of music to evoke emotions, create unity, and inspire personal growth is truly remarkable. It is through music that I find beauty and meaning in life.
7. What makes it hard?
What makes it hard for me is not having my sibling Irene by my side. She was such a vibrant and loving person, and her passing a few years ago left a void in my life that can never be filled. I miss her every single day, and not being able to share life's moments with her is incredibly difficult.
Additionally, as artists, there is often a pressure to always give our best and create something "exceptional" or "better" than our last work. While this pressure can push us to grow and improve, it can also make the experience less beautiful. Sometimes, the expectation to constantly be at our peak can overshadow the joy and spontaneity of the creative process and even turn into frustration. It happens to many artists I know personally. In my case, and with new projects, I try to remember that art is about expression and connection rather than solely achieving perfection or mimicking old hits.
8. Is there something you want to do that you still haven't done?
One of my lifelong goals is a performance containing my major themes performed by a full orchestra, choir, and an array of instruments. But I'm a pretty timid person, so I don't think I'm mentally ready for anything like that. I get dizzy just thinking about it, but I know I'll have to face my fear of heights eventually. Furthermore, it would be quite difficult to organize such a performance due to the high cost involved. If these challenges could be surmounted, nothing would make me happier than to have my repertoire brought to life by world-class musicians on a grand stage surrounded by my fans and supporters from around the world.
9. What element of nature speaks most to you and why?
I enjoy nature a lot, but I am captivated mostly by the sea, despite my thalassophobia (haha I know, I'm a Nervous Nellie), but yeah it is a mesmerizing part of nature that draws me in. To be honest, I would love to have a house near the sea so that my music studio, which is like a sanctuary to me, could be surrounded by the tranquil beauty of a water landscape. This setting, with a scheduled solitude, is invaluable to many artists. It would truly be a dream come true.
10. Is there something you would like to see change about our world?
Really, there is a lot. But as time went on, I saw that many societal problems are, alas, beyond our control. Realizing that not everything in this world is enchanting and lovely is a terrible realization. But, if I could wish for one thing, it would be for humanity as a whole to become more kind and tolerant. It's a cliché, I know, but I really feel that we can build a more peaceful and accepting society if we all try to understand each other and our differences with compassion and care.
In an ideal society, people of all backgrounds (race, gender, sexual orientation, etc.) would be treated with the same level of respect and decency. I think we can strengthen our communities and promote a feeling of oneness among all people by showing more compassion and understanding toward one another. My dream is that one day we will be able to put aside our differences and cooperate to build a better, more equitable society for the next generation.
11. What individual do you look up to?
Steve Jobs is one of the many people I like very much. His drive to create new things and break conventions has always been an inspiration to me. Jobs was one of a kind in his capacity to foresee technological innovations that would transform our daily lives. He stands out from the crowd thanks to his keen eye for detail, dogged pursuit of excellence, and knack for designing engaging user experiences.
Jobs also had an original sense of style and design—something crucial, as one of my main interests is in creating beautiful things. He thought that technological devices should be aesthetically pleasing as well as useful. His focus on minimalistic aesthetics has had far-reaching effects on the tech sector and the way we interact with devices.
12. If you could be an animal, what would you be?
If I could be an animal, I would choose to be a bird. The concept of flight has always captivated me since I was a child. The idea of being able to explore different places and experience the freedom of soaring through the air is truly magical to me.
13. What is your favorite book and why?
In the past, I had more time to read, but finding the opportunity to do so today is extremely challenging. If I had to pick, I'd probably go with The Lord of the Rings. Tolkien's ability to construct a world rich in mythology, culture, and history astounds me. It isn't just a narrative; it has the appearance of being an amazing and real world that may have been at some time in the past. The Lord of the Rings is kind of plausible even with all that fantastic and magic aspects. It is extremely alive and evoking. I love the attention to detail and the great depth Tolkien added to Middle-earth. He even invented functional languages! The Lord of the Rings is no idle fantasy; rather, it is a grand, epic symphony that resonates true with reality. It's influence on my creative journey has been important without doubt.
14. Do you have a favorite time period in history and why?
I used to have a favorite time period in history, particularly when I was younger and influenced by fantasy films. I romanticized the medieval and renaissance periods, drawn to the enchanting tales of knights, castles, and epic adventures. However, as I grew older, I began to realize the immense challenges and hardships that people faced during those times. This shifted my perspective, and now I am more interested in the future and what it has to offer.
I find myself captivated by the potential for progress and innovation that lies ahead. The advancements in technology, science, and society hold endless possibilities for the betterment of humanity. I am excited to witness and contribute to the developments that will shape our future, and create a world that is more inclusive, sustainable, and harmonious.
15. Do you think there is a piece of music that describes your personality. If so, what is it and why?
It's difficult to say since there are many choices, but if you allow me, I would choose one of my repertoire: "The Edge of Consciousness" from my album Immortalys.
This track was created during a challenging period in my life when I was dealing with depression and burnout. Despite these struggles, the song reflects in some way my resilience and determination to keep moving forward. It captures my inner fears and vulnerabilities, highlighting the fact that I have insecurities just like everyone else. But it also captures my vision of life, and how beautiful life is, and how important it is to move forward to live it, freely and intensely.
While not many people are familiar with it, the track delves into the topic of depression and mental health and how it can make us overthink and feel on the edge of an abyss. However, it also acknowledges that there are opportunities and joys in life that can help us break free from that dark place.
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